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Wrestling

AEW Dynamite : January 12th

It’s my brother’s birthday. I can’t believe they are doing a whole episode for him. Happy Birthday, man.

It’s Adam Cole, Bay-Bay! My daughter’s new favourite wrestler. Adam isn’t in action tonight, he just has a few things to say. Namely that he is undefeated and has formed the baddest team ever, with Kyle O’Reilly and Bobby Fish.

Enter the Young Bucks, his forgotten friends. I only heard bits and pieces, because my daughter kept screaming “BOOM!” and “Bay-Bay!”. She really likes Adam Cole. I think the basic gist of things was that the Bucks hate O’Reilly/Fish and vice versa.

Oh look, here comes the Best Friends. The beef thickens, like a delicious beef casserole would. No more words were necessary, which was good because she was still screaming. Is still screaming rather. Adam Cole was the last man standing, until he was confronted by Kris Statlander.

Cole’s wife, Baker stepped in to take care of Statlander. Adam Cole and his friends were left in the ring, with the sprawled out bodies of the Best Friends scattered around them.

Wardlow is in action next, taking on CM Punk. But first, a sneak preview of the Go Big Show which premieres tomorrow. Fortunately, I just got a localised commercial break and didn’t have to watch the preview. What’s worse, Punk or the Go Big Show?

MJF came down to the ring with his pal, Wardlow. Is MJF going to attack Wardlow so Punk loses by DQ?

Hmm, maybe not. The match has officially started and MJF is just watching from ringside. Let’s see how this plays out. I hope Wardlow breaks the old man in half.

I love how when MJF ran away from Punk he was a “damn coward”, but when Punk runs away from Wardlow, it’s “smart”. God damned hypocrites.

The match was pretty dull, at least at first. Wardlow just manhandled Punk for most of it. Don’t get me wrong, it was good to see. Wardlow managed to hit 5 straight powerbombs and looked poised to win. He made the cover, but was interrupted by MJF. Things got interesting from here.

MJF wanted more powerbombs. Wardlow seemed hesitant, but he knows who pays the bills. Powerbomb number 6. Again, says MJF. 7. One more says MJF. This time through a table. Number 8, right through the timekeepers table.

No disqualification was ruled, so the match continued. Punk tried to crawl back to the ring to beat the 10 count. He just made it. If he wins from here, I’m going to riot.

MJF demanded more powerbombs. And of course Punk won through an inside cradle. Boo! Excuse me for a moment, I just need to go smash my television. Then find Tony Khan and punch his stupid face in.

MJF wasn’t pleased with Wardlow after the match. Wardlow wasn’t very happy either. Just when it looked like Wardlow was finally going to drop MJF, Spears came and talked the big man down. Wardlow stormed out of the ring and headed backstage.

Hobbs and Martin are in the ring next, although they started the match before they made it to the ring. It didn’t take long for Hobbs to gain the advantage. He has about 4 times the size of Martin, after all.

As if that wasn’t enough of an advantage, Starks was in Hobbs’ corner and he wasn’t shy about getting involved. Starks is such a good heel, he has been held back by Taz for so long. Let ‘em loose! Anyway, that’s neither here nor there.

Eventually, Jay Lethal had enough of the 2 on 1 and he stepped in to even the odds. This was the only distraction Martin needed to get the quick victory via pinfall. I guess this episode is for the little dudes.

Marves is backstage with Jericho, congratulating the Inner Circle on winning PWI’s Faction of the Year award. Jericho said that was cool and all, but wanted to let 2point0 know that if they interfered with Sammy’s match tonight, the Inner Circle would come down on them.

Eddie Kingston interrupted to tell Jericho to shut up. Kingston asked his friends, Santana and Ortiz to join him instead. They elected to just walk away and not take sides. Kingston wasn’t happy. Jericho and Kingston continued to exchange words and it seems like it is just a matter of time before they meet in the ring.

MJF came storming out to the ring, yelling at the fans to shut up. He seems very angry and upset that Punk won. Next week, Punk will come face to face with Shawn Spears.

Adam Cole has said that the feud with Best Friends is getting pointless, because they just keep getting their asses kicked. Baker and Cole challenged Kris and Orange Cassidy to a mixed tag match next week. Cool!

Here comes the world champ, Hangman! He is on the lookout for a new challenger. Enter Dan Lambert. Lambert says he respects Hangman for earning a title shot, unlike Cody Rhodes. Poor Cody, he’s such an easy target.

Lambert says he doesn’t care if Hangman is the champion or not, he just wants him to drop the Cowboy act because he thinks it’s disrespectful. Ah, the 2020’s. Everything is disrespectful or offensive.

Hey look, Lance Archer is back! Lambert ran away like a scolded dog and Archer took out Adam Page. I guess you got your challenger, champ.

Schiavone is backstage with Arn Anderson, Lee Johnson and Brock Anderson. Ugh, this is going to be a charismatic interview. Tully came along and told Arn to drop the dead weight and come team up with him and FTR. Next week, Brock and Lee will team up to take on FTR. Arn and Tully shook hands, but in a hostile way.

Jade and Mark are happy that Jade won the TBS Championship, because now they get more money. I like money.

Another match and this should be a good one! Hikaru Shida and Serena Deeb are set to face off once more. Poor Shida did’t even make it down the ramp before she was jumped by Deeb. She got a lot of good hits in on Shida’s knee before the match was officially underway.

Not that it was much of a match. Poor Shida could barely stand. Deeb continued to beat down on her for a while, until referee Paul Turner stopped the match. Shida wasn’t happy with him.

Apparently Deeb wasn’t satisfied with the win either, because she continued to wail on Shida afterwards. Aubrey eventually rocked up and asked her to leave. Deeb obliged.

Over to Tony again, this time with our new Tag Team Champions, Jurassic Express. Jungle Boy said that they will accept any challenge, anytime from any team in the Top 5 of the rankings. Silver and Reynolds came out to challenge them for a match on Rampage.

Christian also wanted to wish Rey Fenix a speedy recovery, a sentiment shared by us all, I’m sure.

It’s Big Money Matt Hardy! He’s in action against Penta El Zero Miedo. Go Matt. Go! Speaking of Matt, he has a new podcast and it is quite good. If you are interested, go check out “The Extreme Life of Matt Hardy”, wherever you get your podcasts.

Aw, Matt lost. In front of his family and in his own hometown. They just swept him out of the ring like he was nothing. Penta’s attention immediately turned to Malakai Black. Speak of the devil. Lights out!

When they came back on, Malakai was in the ring and ready to put the hurt on Penta. He went to rip his masks off, which no longer has any significance. It used to be shocking to see a Luchador disrespected like that, but I swear every week someone is trying to rip off the Lucha Bros masks,

The Varsity Blondes rocked up to save Penta. The three of them kicked the crap out of Malakai Black as he sat their laughing. I think Julia asked them to stop. Lights went out. Back on again and Brody King was in the ring. He helped Black take out the Blondes and Penta.

Tony announced that their will be a trios match next week, which will see Leyla, Kris and Red team up to take on a mystery trio. Kris and Leyla argued for a bit. Red kept the peace. Blah, blah, boring.

The number 1 ranked tag team, The Acclaimed are in action next. Max managed to get shots in at Bear Country, Darby Allin, Sting and Novak Djokovic. Nice.

My boys picked up their 33rd victory in convincing fashion over Bear Country and remain the number 1 ranked team. Look at Jurassic Express!

But before that, it looks like they have to deal with Sting and Darby. The duo racked up and attacked the Acclaimed after their bout. Cowards!

Pac cut a promo to address Black. Apparently Pac is now completely blind after Black’s attack. Pac isn’t mad though, he is grateful because now he sees clearly. I really hope they do a blind samurai kind of thing with Pac. Imagine if he wrestles in a blindfold. That would be dope.

It was announced that Cody will be back next week. Why the heck did we do an interim Champion if he was only out for a week?

Tony is backstage with Matt, who is frustrated that he lost in his hometown. Matt said that maybe it is time to focus on himself and dissolve the HFO. Andrade came out to talk to Hardy and offer him the chance to work together. The two left together to have a discussion.

Main event time! It’s for the Interim TNT Championship, and once again it will be presented to the winner by Crockett. Sammy will defend his temporary title against Danny Garcia. Both Eddie Kingston and Jericho were at ringside, presumably to make sure 2point0 stay out of it.

Well, these two certainly didn’t pull any punches. It was very hard hitting and they’ll both have their fair share of bruises come tomorrow.

Sammy looked to be in a bit of trouble, he was on the wrong end of a few submission holds. Then 2point0 rocked up and took out Jericho and Kingston. It all seemed for naught though, because Guevara went on to win.

Guevara was being presented with his title belt, and was then jumped by 2point0. Eddie and Jericho saved him, but then started to fight. The episode ended with them going chest to chest, as tough guys tend to do.

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