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Wrestling

AEW Dynamite : June 4th

I’m a tad slow, but it just dawned on me that with Dynamite airing on a Friday night, they are going to head to head with Smackdown. I just did a quick google search and couldn’t find how the viewership went. Hopefully AEW is kickin’ ass! They must be doing ok, because Dynamite is on Friday again next week. I’m fairly certain they said they would move back to Wednesday for next week’s episode.

The opening match was between the Young Bucks and Death Triangle’s Penta El Zero M and Pac. Tony briefly mentioned during the fight that “we could have new champions”, so I guess this was a title match?

Frankie Kazarian, formerly of SCU, sort of interfered with this match. He attacked Michael Nakazawa, who was just hanging out in the crowd. It had no impact on anything, but Tony really loved it. Apparently Frankie Kazarian is known as “The Elite Killer” now. I assume he will systematically wipe out the Elite, one by one.

The Young Bucks went for the throat and ripped off Penta’s mask, an incredible sign of disrespect to a Luchador. However, it backfired on them. Penta is such an ultimate Lucha, his face has actually become his mask and they revealed nothing. That or he was just wearing 2 masks. I like my version better.

Penta and Pac finally had the Young Bucks down and out, and looked poised to win the belts (or the match, I’m still not sure) but Brandon Cutler wasn’t having that. The cameraman of the year leapt into action and attacked Penta with his camera. A swift blow to the knee knocked the Luchador off the top rope. The Young Bucks capitalised and got the victory. JR was really mad at the referee.

After the match, the Young Bucks continued to beat up the already down duo of Penta and Pac. Eddie Kingston came out to chase them away. It is worth nothing that Brandon Cutler seemed upset that he attacked Penta and also seemed displeased with the choice to attack an already wounded opponent.

Up next, Tony introduced Mark Henry and built some more hype for the new AEW show, which starts August 13th. Mark Henry came out to the ring with no music. I was looking forward to hearing Three 6 Mafia. The crowd showed plenty of love to the former world’s strongest man. And rightfully so. I love Mark Henry.

Henry proclaimed that he isn’t here to fix AEW, because it’s not broken. A nice sentiment, but it is a tiny bit broken. That’s ok though, we’ll keep working at it. Tony asked Henry if he planned to wrestle again. He didn’t say yes and he didn’t say no, which is wrestler speak for yes.

The moment was over pretty quickly, because Vicki Guerrero came out and kicked both Mark Henry and Tony out of the ring. I’m pretty sure that Henry could snap her in half like a twig, but he left peacefully. Vicki had a new star to introduce, Andrade El Idolo, formerly of the WWE.

Haters will hate every time that AEW signs a former WWE star, but business is business and talent is talent. If a good talent is available, you go out and get it. AEW did just that. Andrade promised that he will be the new face of AEW.

More tag team action was next, with the team of Lee Johnson and Cody Rhodes taking on the duo of QT Marshall and Anthony Ogogo. Lee Johnson was a bit late on his attempts to break up a pinning attempt, after mistiming his jump from the top rope. Fortunately, Cody was on the ball and kicked out just before the 3, otherwise we would have had an early ending to this one.

Not much else of note happened in this one. Aaron Solow distracted referee Bryce Remsburg and Ogogo used this time to punch Cody in the face, effectively knocking him out. I’m not sure why Solow had to distract Bryce, because Ogogo didn’t do anything illegal. The commentary team sure acted like he was the biggest cheater in the world though.

Nevertheless, QT used this opportunity to cover Cody for a 3 count, picking up the win for his team. Arn Anderson looked devastated. QT picked up a microphone and told Tony to shove it. Well, he didn’t use that phrase, but that was the basic message.

We watched a highlight reel of Stadium Stampede II and JR said “shame on you if you missed it”. Not everyone has a spare $50 to blow on a wrestling event, Jim. The Inner Circle came out to have their victory lap, which wasn’t really a lap at all. They just stood and talked in the ring.

The Inner Circle did the classic “look under your chairs” and gave everyone in the audience a free t-shirt. They also promised that their feud with the Pinnacle wasn’t over yet. Hager challenged Wardlow to an MMA cage fight on Dynamite in 2 weeks time. I wonder if they are actually going to have a legit MMA fight or if it will be a work. Either way, it should make for some good viewing. Jericho ended the promo by stating that the Inner Circle never forgives and never forgets. Like an elephant.

Over in the locker room, the Best Friends are really angry at Kenny Omega for cheating to retain his AEW Title against Orange Cassidy. And Pac, but they didn’t mention him. Orange Cassidy promised that this isn’t over yet.

Cut to Kenny Omega and he is working on a film package of the title match at Double Or Nothing. Don Callis explains that there is a conspiracy against Omega and he plans to blow it wide open. Omega mentions that he isn’t worried about his upcoming title fight against Jungle Boy, stating that there is a big difference between a Jungle Boy and a Jungle Man.

Another tag team match was on the cards, with Private Party taking on the combination of Jungle Boy and Christian Cage. From what I saw, it was a pretty awesome bout. I was a tad distracted because my daughter was busy plucking my leg hairs and repeatedly shoving her dummy in my sock. Kids.

Jungle Boy ended up getting the win for his team, forcing Quen to tap out. Matt Hardy was very angry. He stormed out of the arena, only to come back and hit Christian Cage with the Twist of Fate. This is a rivalry that is literally decades old and looks like it still has some fuel left. Now we just need Jeffery and Edge to come over and join us. And the D-Von and Bubba Ray. A guy can dream.

Team Taz are hanging out backstage and once again, there seems to be no bad blood after Brian Cage was fighting with the rest of them. Taz points out that Cage and Hangman each have 1 victory over the other and instead of the logical suggestion of a third match, he proposes a tag team match to decide who is the best. Brian Cage and Will Hobbs vs Hangman and a Dark Order member, Hangman can choose which member.

Over to the ring and Tony brings out Sting and Darby Allin. Obviously, they don’t get to say much before being interrupted by Scorpio Sky and Ethan Page. They basically said that Sting carried Darby to the victory on the weekend and challenged Darby to another tag team match, only this time Darby needs to find a new partner. Darby literally said nothing.

In ring festivities continued, with Britt Baker’s celebration party coming up next. Someone will ruin this. My money is on Nola Rose. Copying the Inner Circle, Baker said she had 15,000 burger coupons to give out to the crowd. She said they would be taped to the bottom of their seats. Of course, Baker was lying though.

She proclaimed that because no one in the audience believed in her, none of them deserved a burger. Baker said only 2 people had been with her since day 1, so they would be the only ones sharing in her glory. Britt offered a burger to Tony and Rebel. However, before the 3 of them could take a bite, Nyla Rose slapped the burgers out of their hands and stormed out, popping some balloons on her way. Called it.

Backstage, Pac informs Eddie Kingston that he doesn’t want or need his assistance. Eddie tells him to calm down and to consider the phrase “the enemy of my enemy is my friend”.

Red Velvet was in singles action next, taking on the Bunny. Excalibur was having technical issues, because he was not commentating on this fight. That or he was asleep. I can’t say I blame him. I love the Bunny, but not so much Red, Swole and Kilyn (AKA Big Red).

Blade was in Bunny’s corner and he tried to help her win after gifting her with some brass knuckles, but the attempt to cheat backfired and Red picked up another victory. What’s the point of cheating if it never prospers?

The Dark Order are having a party of their own in the back, celebrating Johnny’s birthday. Apparently Johnny was gifted a TNT title match as a birthday present, but can’t use it because he is injured. It seems weird that wouldn’t just wait for him to heal up before letting him cash his present. Johnny didn’t seem upset and gave his gift to Evil Uno.

That match will take place on Dynamite next week (remember, it is on Friday again). We will also have a trios match, with Penta, Pac and Eddie teaming up to take on the Young Bucks and Brandon Cutler. Maybe Cutler will turn next week? Hangman selected 10 to be his partner in the tag match against Brian Cage and Will Hobbs.

The main event this evening was a Bullrope match between Nick Comoroto and Dustin Rhodes. The commentary team reminded us that anything goes in this match, there are no rules whatsoever. The two combatants are tied together with the bullrope and victory can only come via pinfall or submission.

This match was ok, my main gripe coming at the childish and biased commentary from the desk. Which is often the case. Anytime Nick did anything that they deemed illegal, they were outraged. Anytime Dustin did it, they were impressed with his veteran knowledge. Bah. It makes me sick.

Fuego Del Sol and Colton Gunn both got involved in this match at seperate times, both to attack Nick and give Dustin an unfair advantage. The commentary team had no objections to this.

Aaron Solow set up a table for Nick to use and the commentary team were furious that he would dare to get involved. They were screaming for the referee to do something about the outside interference. Solow didn’t even touch Dustin!

I hate it so much. AEW is wrestling that is marketed at an older audience, not children. How come the commentary team can’t call it down the middle instead of treating us like children, constantly reminding us of the importance of morals, blah, blah, blah. It is so tiresome.

Anyway, Nick put Dustin through the table that Solow set up. Ultimately, it didn’t matter. Good triumphed over evil and Dustin got the win. He technically cheated to do it, but of course, no one cared.

I’m signing off to watch the basketball, go Bucks!

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