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Wrestling

AEW Dynamite : Jan 20th

-1’s birthday! The Dark Order are about to celebrate with some kick before their match, but are interrupted by Chaos Project. Violently! TH2 join the fray and there are bodies everywhere! Hangman comes out and hits everybody with an enormous flying cross body. It was dope. Then the bell rang and I had no idea what the match even was.

Turns out it was Dark Order’s Colt Cabana, Silver and Reynolds teaming up with Hangman. They were taking on the team of TH2 and Chaos Project. It was a pretty decent match. There was a really nice sequence involving almost everyone on the outside. Well, it was nice except for the forced Hangman moonsault. I hate it when the wrestlers stand around on the outside just watching someone get ready for a big move. It’s so forced.

They tried to show off Hangman’s strength by having him lift Silver and Reynolds at the same time. It would be harsh to say he failed miserably, but he definitely didn’t succeed. It looked awful. Kind of like when they put Luther through a table, but the table didn’t break. I hate it when the table doesn’t break. Dark Order pick up the victory.

After the match, Silver fawned over Hangman for a little bit before getting down on one knee and asking the big question. Will Hangman join the Dark Order? The short answer is no. The streamers and music kicked in. “HE SAID YES” appeared on the jumbotron in giant letters. Hangman apologetically walked out of the ring. A lone wolf does not need a pack. Poor Dark Order.

Backstage, Alex Marves is with MJF and Jericho. MJF said that Marves’ voice smells like “rats having an orgy in a running microwave”. I’m sure that’s true. Jericho told Marves to shut up and called him a dumb idiot. It’s also hard to argue with that.

Tony is in the ring and introduces ‘The Icon’ Sting! I don’t know if it is just me, but the excitement of Sting being in AEW has worn off. Is he ever going to actually wrestle? Darby is introduced next and is then congratulated by Sting. Taz interrupts, as he is prone to do. To cut a long story short, Team Taz challenges them to a Streetfight. Darby and Sting accept, if somewhat cryptically. Maybe at Beach Break or Revolution? Should be an awesome match!

The Young Bucks are on their way to see Kenny Omega and of course, Alex Marves pops up. They are at Kenny’s house and I can’t say if it is actually his house or not, but I’m going to say yes. Michael Nakazawa is there and is working as Kenny’s personal assistant and/or butler. I’m not sure. There is an amazing oil painting of Don Callis and Kenny Omega.

Speaking of Callis, he shortly enters the room to greet the Young Bucks. “Marves, I don’t know what you are doing here” Callis states. I concur. This segment ran for way too long, so to cut it short, Callis basically tries to buy the Young Bucks out of Omega’s life. He is largely unsuccessful and the segment ends with a ‘Callis’ assault (see what I did there?) by the Bucks. We hear the screams of Don Callis as the camera fades to black.

Time for a match! That’s what we are here for. ‘Pretty’ Peter Avalon is taking on the former TNT Champion, Cody Rhodes! Rhodes hits the Cross Rhodes pretty early on (almost instantly) and the match looks to be over. Jade the comes out and stares down Cody. Whilst he is distracted, Avalon kicks him right in crown jewels!

I wish Avalon picked up the victory after that. A quick schoolboy roll up or something. Make Jade’s interference actually mean something by costing Cody the match. But, that didn’t happen. Jade left and the match continued, making her interference seem pointless. The match went on and eventually, Avalon tapped out, to avoid getting slapped across his pretty face. It was actually a very amusing ending.

Cody will apparently address Jade and Shaw next week on Dynamite. Still, I wish he lost tonight. It would have made more sense.

FTR are backstage with (guess who) and discussing the fact that they are the number 1 contenders for the title and the greatest tag team in the world. They are interrupted (as these interviews seem to always be) by Jurassic Express. Jungle Boy challenges Dax to a singles match for next weeks episode. Everyone else will be at ringside, but no one will interfere with the match. Allegedly.

Mox makes his way to the ring and spits a disgusting amount of water from his mouth. It was really gross. He is fighting my new crush, Nick Comoroto. Unfortunately, Nick lost. If you ask me, he is the real winner though. You should have seen him charge into the corner. He took that hit like a champ.

After the match, Mox rambled on about Kenny and whatever for a little while. I will say, he looks like he has trimmed up and is in incredible shape. When I became a new father, I got fatter. Not fair!

Eddie Kingston is backstage and discussing his match with Archer next week and is, of course, interrupted by Archer. They yell and scream for a little bit. Lance Archer says “everybody dies” about 40 thousand times, like we’ve never heard that before. Not much else happens. A lot of chest puffing and jawing off.

Alex Marves spawns in front of Kenny Omega and wants to talk about something. Kenny realises that Callis has a black eye and Callis “accidentally” lets it slip that it was Matt and Nick. Kenny seems to be upset and angry by the betrayal of his friends.

The high flying trio of Matt Sydal and Top Flight have joined forces to take on “Big Money” Matt Hardy and Private Party. Before we talk about that match though, we need to talk about what happened on Impact!

Private Party beat the team of Chris Sabin and James Storm to become the number 1 contenders for the Impact! Tag Team Titles. What? Bizarre. Also, how come Sabin was teamed with Storm and not Shelley? They mentioned that Shelley was absent, but didn’t say why. I’ve done some digging and it hasn’t been listed, but something seems off. I hope that Shelley is ok. It was a great match, by the way.

Back to AEW. Hardy is showing a lot of tough love to Private Party. Quen needs to tag out, but Hardy doesn’t let him. He tells him to go back and fight, which Quen does for about 3 seconds and then Hardy lets him tag out. Strange. Private Party picked up the win after a chair shot from Cassidy! Quen looked upset at first, but then he smiled and hit a moonsault for the win. After the win, Private Party and Matt Hardy put the hurt on their opponents. I love a good beatdown. Looks like a heel turn is on the cards for Private Party. That should be fun!

The match went for about 15 minutes and they made it all the way to the end of the match before Tony mentioned that Private Party upset the Young Bucks in the Tag Team Tournament at the beginning of AEW. Almost made it without mentioning it! So close. It must have been killing him to keep it inside for 15 minutes. Maybe next time, Tony.

MJF addresses Inner Circle (minus Jericho) and talks about their upcoming match against one another. He says if it was up to him, they wouldn’t be fighting. He fist bumps everyone, but Sammy refuses. “We ain’t there yet” says Sammy.

Next up is Penelope Ford, with Kip, Miro and their new servant Charles Taylor, taking action against Leyla Hirsch. Penelope is rocking a new hairdo and it looks very cool! Penelope is another star that looks like she has toned up and gotten in incredible shape, not that she was ever out of shape. It looks like everyone except for me is toning up.

This was a decent enough match, but there were a lot of distractions happening on the outside. We had the whole Chuck the Youngboy angle. Miro was dressed to impress, as always. Seriously, that guy has the best wardrobe. I’m going to tweet him, see if he can hook me up. The camera and commentary team kept cutting to Orange Cassidy in the crowd, it was like he had an upcoming match with Penelope.

Penelope obviously won. After the match, Miro made Chuck tell Orange Cassidy that “Miro is my best friend now”. Orange Cassidy walked out of the arena. One can only assume his heart is broken.

We quickly cut backstage, because Kenny has rounded up the Good Brothers and they are out for blood. I assumed to see them beating up Matt and/or Nick. Once again, I was wrong. Once again, it was Penta. How come the Lucha Bros are subbing in for the Young Bucks in this feud? Next week a match is announced and it features the Good Brothers teaming up with the Young Bucks. I don’t know what is happening with this feud.

JR mentions that the main event is up next and it features 6 members of the “Intra Circle”. Oops. We also have received the news that their will be a Number 1 contenders tournament for the AEW Women’s Championship and a Tag Team Battle Royale to determine the Number 1 contenders for the Tag Team titles. I don’t understand why we bother with the rankings anymore.

Finally, it’s time for the main event. MJF and Jericho come out first and they have a new song, which is a hybrid of both of their songs. This does not bode well for the other 2 teams. If they have a new song, it almost guarantees a victory. Sammy and Hager come out next and are introduced (virtually) by Sammy Hagar. Finally, my boys, Santana and Ortiz make their way to the ring. Everyone fist bumps and the match gets under way.

It was a pretty good match, but the longer it went on, the more it felt like MJF and Jericho were going to win. Ultimately, they did. MJF pinned Sammy, which I’m sure will come up in the future. I really wanted Santana and Ortiz to win. I love those guys. Jericho said that after this match, no matter what happened, they’d all get back to being a big family. I guess we will have to wait and see what happens next, but this is the second fight they’ve had within a period of a few weeks. I think the Inner Circle is almost over.

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